Ten to two...

Oh how I miss him...I really long for him...and so finally comes the moment I've been waiting for...an opportunity arise and she is going away...it's just that he finds out a little too late for me to change my plans for the weekend and go to him...so now I feel like I'm wasting time...time I could've spent with him... :(...and that really sucks...I mean those moments aren't that many...and they probably never will be either... :(
I don't know what to do... I feel so much for this man...and I want to share everyday-life with him...I want to show him what a life with me could be like...but how can I? When I can't even get to see him whenever I want? I think I have to break free...break free from him....break free from what I feel for him...break free from me even in a way...but how can I? Can someone please tell me how to do that? I really need to know...for my insanity...because you know, love can really make go insane...I believe that...
Oh well...why should today be any different from yesterday or the day before that....or every day up until now? I just want to be loved...ok so I want to be loved by someone special but still....just to be loved...to have someone to hold me and to just love me....for me...for the thing that makes me special...to come up to me and tell me that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me... because of the simple reason that he loves me....so easy....why can't he?
Why does he need to be taken? Why? Why couldn't he have waited for me? I waited for him...sort of...*sigh*...

puss puss p... I don't know what to do with all these feelings I got for you...