The day have past...

So, now have the whole day past...he called me once more...or actually twice but I missed the last one...:( and now he's home and can't really call me...too bad...but on the other hand I don't really want him to call me when his gf is there right beside him...he's not the same person then...for obvious reasons of course....even I know that...I know that I'm the third person here...I know that I'm the one that should back away and leave them alone...but how can I when I know in my heart that this is the one for me? It's so hard....

"It’s hard to
Long for someone
Especially when
This someone
Is so far away
And far away
Doesn’t mean just geographically
Emotionally as well
Unavailable
Not mine"

And it really makes me wonder what the reason for meeting him was if not for falling for him?

"Isn’t life strange?
Two strangers meet
As friends
But then it all changes
And a sudden wave of emotions
Stirs up
Unexplained emotions
Unexpected feelings
And everything could
Be all good
If both were free to choose
Each other
But life isn’t that easy
It’s never that easy…"

So why...and this I ask myself a million times over and over again...why does it have to be this way? Why does it have to be so hard?
I wish he could be here next to me...just talking to me...but no....I can't even talk to him over the Internet either...oh I feel so sad...
Oh God, why? Can't you see what this does to me?
oh well...that's it for now I think....

puss puss p...