Friday, 30 March 2007

Feeling sad, low and just not wanted...

Well...so..I'm feeling a bit low...haven't talked to him today...:( ...not yet anyway...ok unless you count late last night...or this morning might be more correct... :)
Internet is a wonderful thing...it really is...you can talk to people all over the world...and pretty much whenever you are online there will be someone out there to talk too...you don't have to feel so alone...and that is good... :)
So, back to my confused mind...for a moment I decided to give up...I'm so tired...I have been alone for a really long time so I'm not really up for playing around just to end up even more alone in the end...since that's how I will feel when I lose him...and unfortunately I really believe that I will...
I think I got it bad for this guy...unfortunately...because everytime I don't hear from him I feel rejected...is that how it suppose to be? I don't think so but it still does...perhaps I'm just stupid...I know that some people think I am...after all he is taken...but still....don't they say that everything is fair in love and war? Hmm...I'm not a bad person...I just have been putting others ahead of me for so long that I think it's time for me now...and if some will get hurt in the way then...I'm sorry for them...

"I feel a pain in my heart
And I don’t know why
There is no reason for it
I’m not ill
I’m not in love
I’m nothing
And still it’s there
It won’t go away

Is he worth it?
Is he all that I want?
Do I want to spend the rest of my life with him?
Have a family with him?
Do I really want him in my life?
One little word can answer all
That word is…yes.

But how can he be?
I barely know him.

He makes me feel beautiful
He makes me feel wonderful
He makes me feel sexy
He makes me feel confident
He makes me feel that I can do anything
That I can have anything I want
Except for
Him

He’s not available to me
Not in the way that I want
He’s taken
And has been for a long while

But now is another time
It’s my time
And I’m gonna get him
Because it’s my time
I want him
I want happiness
Too
It’s my time…"

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